Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

This happened to me and my group of good friends when I was still staying in hostel. Val, Ling, Mel and me had became very close as we were neighbours in hall. Me and ling were of the same year whereas Val is one year older than me and Mel is one year younger than me. All four of us participated actively in hall activities. When I was in year 3, Mel is one of the Block Representative for my our Block.

The incident happened during my year 3 second semester when Val and Ling are graduating. Being a senior in hall, I decided to leave hall with them because most of my close friends are graduating. For my past 3 years in hall, I have done what I wanted to try and I want to focus more on my studies as I have been neglecting them due to hall activities. Ling wants to enjoy her final year therefore she also started to miss out on alot of hall activities. Val despite being her final semester, was less busy than me because she only has her fyp and 1 s/u module to cope for that semester. Therefore she still find time to attend some block activities.

Mel was not very happy with Ling and me because she feels that as hall residents, we should attend hall activities. As a Blk Reprentative myself when I was in year 1, I totally understand why she feel this way. I felt the same way about about my seniors who missed out on hall activities when I was in year 1. I cannot understand why they behave like until then. We named those people 'phantoms' of the hall. I have to concentrate on building up on my resume and prepare myself for the working world.

Being 1 year younger than me, I feel that Mel still cannot see my point of view. She knew that I was busy with my work and writing resumes for internship but her attitude towards me and Ling changes. Ling and I could not seem to do anything about it. Despite our busy schedules, Ling, Val and me were still in contact with each other after we leave hall but Ling and me do not have much contact with Mel since then. Val is still in contact with Mel occasionally.

Can you advise me how to solve this issue? I feel that it is really silly to forgo a friendship for life over this issue.

Effective Communication Skills

Effective communication skills are important especially since we live in an environment where we have to deal with people everyday. People who are equipped with effective communication skills will have good interpersonal relationships in their work place, social circle, school and family etc. This is because being able to communicate effectively will reduce misunderstandings and establish stronger relationships with people. Misunderstandings arise when the party that we are conversing with misinterprets our actual intentions. Everyone is unique as they are brought up in different culture and upbringing and hence the differences among people arises. These differences might lead to misunderstandings when we interact with one another.

In the work place, communicating effectively will help prevent us from committing grave mistakes at work. For instance, goods which cannot be delivered on time at the correct location will cause the company to incur a loss and affect its credibility. On the other hand, it will be helpful in work if we are able to establish good relationships with our clients or colleagues. People will also be more forgiving towards us when we commit a mistake and it will be easy for us to ask for help whenever we encounter a problem. Moreover being able to communicate well with others will also leave a good impression of us and this is especially helpful when we are going for job interviews.

Effective communication skills is essential and it is a skill to keep for life. However these skills require time to master and is built on experiences. Therefore it is important that we make an effort to develop and enhance this skills along the way in life.